I'm not a blogger, at least not yet but I need a place to deal with my grief and I figured I would try this.
I lost my dad unexpectedly at the end of October 2015 and since then I feel lost. There are good days and bad weeks. It's up and down with no reason. There is always this feeling, deep down under everything else that can't be satisfied. It's like an unquenchable thirst. This thirst is present in everything I do and say. There are times it feels like I'm choking on it.
My dad was a truck driver for years. On cold winter days, he always had this smell of cold and diesel when he would get home. I smelled that today at Wegmans and it rocked me to my core. The smell almost engulfed me at different places in the store. It stopped me in my tracks and it took all my being not to crumble to the floor right then and there. I loved that smell. It was Dad.
